


Four Seasons

by gaydemonium



Category: Mortal Instruments, Shadowhunters
Genre: M/M, Malec, Malec Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-06
Updated: 2016-05-06
Packaged: 2018-06-06 19:05:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6766105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaydemonium/pseuds/gaydemonium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a 4 part mini series about Alec and Magnus and their relationship throughout the years. Told in Magnus' point of view</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Spring Beginning

It was spring time when I proposed to Alec. The trees were beginning to bloom again, the birds were returning from their southern vacation and school had started up again for the mundane children. Max would be starting school soon. I would be home schooling him. Alec would be schooling Raphael. 

Naturally, Alec was thrilled when I asked him to marry me. The boys were with us at the time and they both squealed with joy as Alec and I kissed. Raphael was 9. Max was 7. Both were as thick as thieves and you'd never find one of them too far away from the other. Family doesn't end in blood, as the saying goes. 

The real pain of it all is getting ready for the wedding. I say this because I'm not a Shadowhunter. Traditionally, when two Shadowhunters get married they exchange the wedded rune, placing one on their partner's skin. Runes on my skin would kill me. Or I'd go insane. Worst case scenario is that my body would burn to death as soon as the stele is placed on my skin. Nothing says "I do" more than setting your husband on fire at the altar. 

"We'll find a way," Alec had told me. "We always do."

Alec didn't used to be this optimistic. It was only when we started dating that he began to see the brighter side of things. He claims that I opened his eyes to the world around him, whereas I claimed he unlocked something in me. Having trust issues for so many centuries kind of leaves you living a lonely and secluded life. Until the right person comes along, that is. You can throw as many parties as you like and own as many clubs as you want but nothing can ever replace the emptiness in your heart. 

And that's where Alexander came in. 

The night he and his posse of Nephilim came into my club looking for information about a mundane girl's blocked memories was the first day of the beginning of the rest of my life. Alec had shot a circle member with his bow and arrows from a great distance in my club, and his confidence with his weapons and skill was what attracted me to him the most. Granted, at the time I didn't know that he wasn't fully "out" when I began to lay down my warlock charm and he shied away from it. I just thought he was playing hard to get. 

You see, demons are assholes. To be completely blunt with you, demons are the assholes of the other dimension. They will use every weakness they can against you and make you confront your greatest fears and darkest thoughts. Sometimes they'll even expose your deepest secret. This particular demon that these Shadowhunters had me summon did just that. We each needed to sacrifice a memory of the one we loved most. Alec's just so happened to be of Jace, his parabatai. 

Jace, of course, as stupid as he is, had absolutely no idea what the true meaning of Alec's memory was. I knew immediately. The boy loved his parabatai in ways that was strictly forbidden in their world. Homosexuality is a big no-no. Falling in love with your parabatai is an even bigger no-no. It results in the removal of marks and the boot from the Shadowhunter world. You're basically shunned and forced to live the rest of your life as a mundane. 

I didn't want that for Alec. Not only is being gay frowned upon, falling in love with a Downworlder is just downright preposterous. He wasn't okay with who he was when we first began to talk a little bit, but eventually I got him to open up and see the world a little differently. I thought for sure I had changed his mind and he was okay with being gay. 

Until he told me he was getting married. To a girl. 

"It's tradition. I'm keeping the Lightwood name alive. Reviving it," he had told me. 

Yes but do you love her? I wanted to scream at him at the time. I hated seeing him being forced into something that he didn't want to do but this is classic Alec. Always putting others first before himself. This is who he was. This is who he will always be. 

"You should marry for love. Not because you think you're doing the right thing," I said to him. 

"Sometimes you don't have a choice."

I lost a lot of sleep the next few days while waiting for that damned wedding. Imagine my surprise when his younger sister Isabelle shows up at my door with a wedding invitation in her hands, telling me "You know what to do" and then walking away in those death trap of a pair of high heels she wears all the time. 

So then I pondered to myself (and with the maybe not so dead Ragnor Fell) whether or not I should go to the wedding. In his own unusual way, Ragnor was a big help. He basically told me to get up off my ass and go for what I wanted in life. In this case, I wanted Alec. 

Amazingly I got there just in time. Lydia Branwell (whose ancestor I knew all too well. The scatterbrain Henry Branwell) was about to place the wedded rune on Alec's wrist when I waltzed in through the door. Maryse went nuts, demanding to know why I was there and who invited me. Isabelle said nothing, the sneaky minx. 

Alec, on the other hand, stared at me from the altar in awe and in shock as I looked up at him. He was struggling to breathe, I knew that much. So was I. He looked incredibly gorgeous in the gold suit he was wearing. How could he not? He was Adonis. Maryse was the boar. Lydia was Aphrodite. I was Persephone. But instead of spending the summer with Lydia and the winter with me, I wanted him twelve months of the year. Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter. I wanted him to be with me. 

I was blessed by the Angel that day. By some trick of fate, Alec defied his parent's orders. That young man who used to follow all the rules and played it safe with life decided to walk straight up the aisle, tell his mother off in front of a crowd of people, grab me by the collar and kiss me. Like actually kiss me. 

Even the fiery pits of Hell itself wasn't as nearly as hot as the passion and sparks that surged between us. Alec pulled away momentarily to look into my eyes before going in for another kiss. Another kiss. As if one wasn't enough, he had to go for another. At that moment I wasn't sure if my heart was beating really fast or if I was swelling with pride. Probably both. 

He wasn't quite the same after that. Not in a bad way, though. Alec changed in the most beautiful way possible. It was like he was given a new outlook on life as well as a new purpose. He suddenly became an advocate for Shadowhunters who were struggling with their sexuality and it was the most beautiful thing my centuries old eyes had ever seen. 

After everything we had been through, our ups and our downs, battles and wars, struggles and fights, my biggest accomplishment thus far had been taking in Max. Our special little blueberry who was abandoned by his family after discovering what he was (a warlock like myself). 

It was Alec who had found him on the street one day. A small toddler huddled under a piece of cardboard in an alleyway. Alec shone the flashlight on him and Max's skin shone a deep blue color. Like a blueberry. Hence his nickname. 

"Don't be scared. I'm not going to hurt you," Alec whispered, crouching down and holding out a hand to the boy. 

Immediately, and I was there at the time this happened, Max raced out from under his little cardboard home. I thought for sure he was trying to make a run for it so I braced myself in case I needed to catch him. But that wasn't so. 

Max raced out of his cardboard home and ran straight into Alec's arms, clinging onto him for dear life. 

Alec had a look of surprise on his face as he slowly wrapped his own arms around the child. Max, still clinging to him, hummed with content and began to suck his thumb as he cuddled into Alec. 

"That's it. We're taking him home with us," Alec said. 

"The Clave won't allow it. He's a Downworlder. They'll try to take him from us," I whispered to him. 

Alec glared at me. "I'd like to see them try. I'll kill every single one of them who tries to take him away from us."

So that was that. The little boy came back to the institute with us. We named him Max after Alec's deceased little brother. He took pretty quickly to his new home, always racing down the hall on his two chubby legs, laughing when Alec pretended to chase him and when he threw Max up in the air, causing him to squeal with delight. His laughter filled the halls of the institute and our apartment and there wasn't a thing in the world that we'd trade those moments for. 

That's when Raphael came in. Alec made a trip to Buenos Aires to help clean up the remainder of the destruction that Sebastian left behind, and that's when he came across a small orphaned 5 year old boy who was living on the streets and stealing food from mundanes. He was screaming something about monsters when Alec finally managed to catch him (I was told he was very fast). Alec knew immediately that the boy was of Shadowhunter blood. We just didn't know which family he belonged to. We still don't know to this very day. 

Naturally, Alec brought the boy home with him and named him Raphael after an old friend of mine. Raphael wasn't as calm as Max was when he first arrived at the institute. He was skittish and every sound made him flinch. He stayed mostly to himself and away from people. If they tried to approach him, he'd run away and hide somewhere. 

Max, on the other hand, was the only person he didn't run from. 

As soon as Max saw Raphael when he and Alec returned through a portal, he came racing over with his toy blocks in his hands. He smiled at Raphael, who stayed hidden behind Alec's back and clutching at Alec's pant leg. 

"Papa?" Max pointed at Raphael. "Mm?"

Alec smiled. "Max. This is Raphael. He's going to be your big brother. How do you like that? You have someone to play with!"

Max giggled at this, holding out a block to Raphael. "Play?" He asked in his sweet little innocent voice. 

I had been watching closely at the kids when this happened. Raphael stared at the block first before slowly reaching out to take it. Max grabbed him by the hand and pulled him along towards the playroom and in no time at all, Alec and I heard giggles and laughter coming from the room. 

"That was fast," I chuckled as the giggles and the crashing of blocks grew louder. 

"What did you expect? It's Max we're talking about," Alec smiled at me, planting a gentle kiss on my lips. 

Spring was also the season when Raphael asked me why his brother was blue. 

"Blue like sad or blue like the color?" I asked him. We were outside planting flowers in the front yard for arts and crafts. Max was much too busy making mud castles to be paying attention to the conversation Raph and I were having. 

"His skin. It's blue. How come?" Raph asked again. 

I sighed. "Well Raphy....Max isn't a Shadowhunter like you are. He's a warlock like me. You know how papa has his golden eyes, right?" Raphael nodded attentively. "Well, Max's special gift is his blue skin. That's what makes him special."

Raphael looked over his shoulder then at his little brother. "Does it hurt him? Having blue skin?"

"Of course not. Look how happy he is!" I laughed when Max slapped a handful of mud on his face. 

Raphael smiled. "But will people hurt him because of his gift?"

This threw me off. I wasn't expecting to be having such a deep conversation with a 6 year old about his little brother's skin color. It was touching but at the same time, it made me nervous. I never knew what to expect with Raphael. Max was an open book. Raphael wasn't. 

"Some people might try," was all I could say. What could I say? Raph was 5. I couldn't really have an adult conversation with him about discrimination and racism. 

Raphael nodded. "I'll protect him, papa. No one's gonna hurt my brother."

I watched him in complete awe as he grabbed the hem of his shirt and went over to Max and wiped Max's muddy face off with it. 

Spring was the season of new possibilities and new beginnings. A lot of things happened in the season of Spring. I had two kids, I was getting married, my school for wayward warlocks was a growing success (more on that later) and life couldn't get any better than it already was. The life I thought I could never have was actually becoming a very real possibility for me. I wanted this life just as much as Alec did, and I'll fight anyone who tried to come along and take it away from me. 

I'll fight every last one of them.


	2. Summer Romance

Summer time in Brooklyn was always interesting. I tended to shake things up a little bit by making it snow for the boys or casting a spell on their pool toys so that they moved on their own while the boys played with them. It was never dull moment during the Summer. 

It was also the season that Alec and I got married in. I remember the day all too well. It started off a little cloudy but by the afternoon, the sun was blazing and there wasn't a single cloud in the sky. I couldn't ask for a better day to have a wedding. 

Alec was fumbling with the cuffs of his suit. It wasn't hard to tell that the man was nervous. I was nervous too; I was just better at hiding it than he was. 

"You're doing it wrong," I said to him as his button popped open for the millionth time. 

"No kidding. I don't even think I put my pants on the right way this morning when I woke up," he chuckled nervously as I helped him with his cuffs. "I feel sick to my stomach, Magnus. Like I'm going to throw up."

"That's just your nerves. You'll be fine once we're out there reciting our vows. You did remember to bring your vows, right?"

Alec nodded. "Yes. I got them in my pocket. Put them in there last night so I wouldn't forget." He took a deep breath and looked at his reflection in the mirror. "Do I look okay?"

I looked him over and smiled broadly. "You look extremely handsome. Are you sure we can't just elope? So I can recite my vows naked to you?"

He laughed at this. I loved his laugh. It was almost as nice as petting a puppy or getting extra icing on your chocolate cake. "I'm sure. My family would probably kill me if they didn't get the chance to see me get married. Especially Izzy. She put so much thought and effort into planning our special day."

This was true. Isabelle and Clary had been planning our wedding for years. Yes, Alec and I had been engaged for 4 years. We both had been so busy that we really couldn't find the time to just get married. It was actually Isabelle who put her foot down one day and claimed that the wedding was happening asap. Sure enough, two weeks later the institute was decorated and suddenly it was our wedding day. 

"I can't believe we're finally getting married," Alec smiled. "It seems like a lifetime ago that we just met."

"Memory demons. Bringing lovers together since the dawn of time," I smirked as Alec grinned at me. "Do you have any regrets?"

"Regrets?" Alec shook his head. "None. None whatsoever. Every decision I've made thus far has led me to this point in my life. I wouldn't go back and change a thing."

I nodded. "Neither would I, Alexander. Neither would I."

And just like the blink of an eye, we were married. Vows were shared, cake was crushed in our faces, we danced the night away. Just like that it was over. I barely even had time to fully relish in the feeling when I realized that this actually happened. I was married. I had a gorgeous husband and two sons now. This dream I've had ever since I could remember had finally come true. I had the family I always dreamed of. 

Two summers after we got married, we got into a fight. It was stupid, really. Looking back on it now, I regret all the awful things I said to Alec at the time. I'd take them all back if I could. 

"What do you mean, they voted against Downworlders adopting Shadowhunter children?!" I shouted at him. 

Alec, the Inquisitor at the time, gripped his hair in frustration. "What else could I mean, Magnus? Huh? I submitted a request for a new law and it was turned down. They see it as an atrocity. Downworlders raising Shadowhunter children is like having two gay parents to them."

I laughed. "Oh okay then. I'd hate to know what they think of us then. You're gay. I'm bi. We have two sons. One of them is a Shadowhunter. We must be the talk of the office!"

"They let us keep Raphael, Magnus! Do you know how hard I had to fight to make that happen?! I'm trying to do the same for other families as well!"

The veins in his neck bulged as he yelled at me. Alec never yelled. He barely even rose his voice when the boys were doing something they shouldn't. He spoke to them in a calm, stern voice and they both knew he meant business. Every time. 

I remember hearing a sniffle that day and turned to see Max and Raphael peeking around the corner of the doorway, Max wiping his tears and Raphael gripping his brother's shoulders with protective hands. They must've heard the fight and came out to see what was going on. The look on their faces nearly broke my heart that day. Like it was the worst thing that could have ever happened to them. 

"Daddy? Why are you and papa fighting?" Max whispered. 

Alec glanced at me before gathering the little blueberry into his arms. "It's okay, Max. Papa and I were just a little upset with each other. We weren't fighting."

"Sounded like fighting to me," Raphael grumbled. He delevoped a sassy personality over the past four years. He really did come out of his shy shell. 

"Well, we weren't. Okay? Now go back to bed. It's a school night. You don't want to be tired during your studies tomorrow, do you?" I ruffled Raph's hair and he smiled. "I know how much you love learning new runes. And Max loves trying new spells."

Max smiled as he cuddled into Alec's neck. "I set my socks on fire today, daddy."

I frowned. "And you didn't say anything to anybody about this?"

"It's okay, papa. I put it out before it spread," Raphael seemed pretty proud of himself so I pat him on the shoulder, which seemed to please him. "Max isn't supposed to practice spells without you. I told him this already."

Alec smirked over Max's head at me. His dimples smile made me smile, regardless of the events that just occurred ten minutes ago. "We're very proud of you, Raphael. You took responsibility and action. That's very grown up of you."

That was the last time Max ever set his clothes on fire. But that's not to say he didn't set anything else on fire. Three years later (during summer, coincidentally) while Raphael was away at the institute for his training, Max made the microwave explode. No magic was involved. He just made it explode by putting something he shouldn't have inside. He was devilish like that. He was always getting into trouble. 

"I'm sorry, papa. I was experimenting with some key ingredients for a recipe." Max had discovered cooking channels recently. His new obsession was cooking. Or trying to, anyway. 

"What were you trying to make? It stinks in here," I plugged my nose as I opened the door to the microwave. The inside was a complete disaster. Burnt to a crisp, smoke coming out of it. I remember at the time thinking why did this child get into so much trouble?

"The box said 30-35 minutes in 450 degrees Fahrenheit. I couldn't find the temperature so I set the microwave to 35 minutes. These were the results, unfortunately...." Max was old enough now to conduct experiments, whether it be with magic or my beloved kitchen. Most of his tests turned out to be a disaster, but that never did stop him from trying again. 

I sighed. "Here, bud. Let me show you how to cook this, okay? We'll surprise daddy and Raph when they come home from the institute, okay?"

Max beamed and nodded. "Can we say I cooked it? With no help from you?"

I chuckled. "Sure. Your secret is safe with me."

I look back at memories of my kids all the time and laugh. It was never a dull moment with Max and Raphael. Those two always managed to bring out the laughter in me and put a smile on my face. Same with Alec. The once serious Shadowhunter had a serious soft spot when it came to his boys. Even when he became Inquisitor and came home from a long day at work, Raphael set up the dinner table and prepared a hot bath for Alec. Max would cook up a delicious new recipe he found online or in one of his hundreds of cookbooks and serve it for dinner. We were a happy family. Always laughing, always teaching new morals to the boys and always making sure we were safe and sound at the end of the day. 

Summer was also the season when Raphael got a girlfriend. Now 14, the hormones were beginning to set in; he was growing fast, his voice was beginning to change and he began to develop an interest in girls. Everywhere he went, he had an eye on the ladies around him. He was a real charmer, much like myself. He was a smooth talker and often for his way with everything and everyone. This got him into trouble sometimes. 

Max, on the other hand, was a lot like Alec. He was now 12 years old; skinny and lanky as Alec had been at that age, his dark hair was wild and curly and his eyes were wide and full of life. He loved to learn and had a thirst for knowledge. Glasses on the edge of nose, I'd always find him with his face buried in a book as he tried out new spells and recipes. He showed real promise in the culinary arts as well as spell casting. I remember him telling me once that he wanted to open a restaurant with exotic foods from all over the world. I believed he had the passion and determination so I told him to follow his dreams. 

One day, Raphael came up to me during one of my conferences with the Clave. Sometimes I'd work from home or I'd go into Idris myself. This time, I had decided to stay home, mainly because Alec wasn't here to watch the kids while I was gone. 

"Papa? Can I ask you a question?" Raph asked. 

"I don't know. Can you?" I smirked as Raphael rolled his eyes. "Yes, son. Go ahead. Ask away."

Raph took a deep breath. "How do you....um.....kiss a girl?"

Max, who was sitting on the couch with his legs sprawled over the arm began to laugh. "Raphy got a girlfriend! Raphy got a girlfriend!"

Raphael whirled around. "Shut up, Max! No one asked for your opinion!

"Raph. Watch it," I said, my tone serious. "Why do you want to know? Are you and Marceline...."

His face turned red. "I really like her, papa. I want to kiss her but I don't know how...."

"Like this!" Max cried and began kissing the back of his hand and making animal noises. He giggled as Raphael made a move to chase him, screaming and running to his room. 

"Not exactly helpful, is he? All those books he reads and he hasn't learned to shut up...." Raphael grumbled, stopping when I glared at him. "Sorry. He's just so annoying..."

"He's also your brother and you love him regardless. Now. You wanted to know how to kiss?" He nodded and watched me attentively. "Rule number one. You have to be in the moment."

"In the moment?"

"Like....it has to be romantic. Maybe outside on a starry night. Or out on a picnic. How many dates have you been on."

Raph shrugged. "Maybe three? Or four? I haven't counted."

I scoffed. "You plan on proposing on the fifth date? Getting married on the sixth?"

"What? No! I'm 14! I'm too young to get married!" He gagged and shuddered. "Do I have to go to dad and ask him about this?"

"Ask me about what?" Alec walked in through the door, nearly tripping over his Inquisitor robes. 

"Raphael wants to know how to kiss a girl, Alexander," I grinned as Alec's eyes widened in surprise. 

"Uh....I don't think that's my area of expertise, Raph....sorry."

Raphael nodded. "I forgot, dad. Sorry. Should I just wing it? Go with the flow as mundanes say?"

I shrugged. "Do what you think is best, kiddo. I'm sure Marceline would love you for trying regardless, right?"

"Who knows. Girls are confusing anyway. One minute they're fine and the next they have their seraph blade to your throat demanding to know if their hair looks okay."

"That sounds like your aunt Izzy," Alec called out from the bedroom. When he came back out, he was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. "She did that to me once when I told her that her hair looked frizzy. Called her Frizzy Izzy."

I choked back a laugh, trying not to imagine a 14 year old Alec being threatened by his 12 year old sister. 

"My point being....just do what your gut tells you to do. Kiss the girl. If she doesn't like it then you know it wasn't meant to be. At least you can say you tried, right?" Alec draped an arm over Raphael's shoulders. 

Raph nodded. "Yeah. You're right. Thanks papa. Thanks dad."

After Raph went to his room, I clearly recall there being a lot of kissing of our own that night. We both laid down on the couch together, window wide open with a nice breeze blowing in, and we just kissed. It had been a while since I let my fingers roam over Alec's hard muscled body, and I enjoyed it. He seemed to be too as he gripped my hips and moaned softly. 

"Shhh. You'll wake the boys," I whispered between kisses. 

"The boys are dead to the world when they sleep. They can sleep through a demon war and they won't hear a thing," Alec kissed my neck and gently sucked on the skin there. "Remember the hickies we used to leave on each other's skin?"

I laughed. "Of course. Didn't Jace ask you if you were bit by a vampire one time?"

Alec's deep laugh vibrated through my body. "He did. I told him I fell."

"On your neck?" 

We both burst out laughing and cuddled together on the couch for a while longer before we both eventually fell asleep. 

For me, Summer had always been a time for romance. It certainly had been for my family. And regardless of the outcome, we could always say that we tried. Because in the end, that's all that really mattered.


	3. Autumn Love

Autumn was my favorite time of year. The weather wasn't too hot or too cold. It was perfect sweater weather. Also, it was perfect cuddle weather. Oh, and the leaves look nice too. Nice shades of orange and yellow and brown. 

The boys were both well into teenagerhood. Raphael was 17, nearly 18, practically an adult in Shadowhunter terms. He filled out over the course of three years, as well as got taller. He was almost as tall as Alec. He was a strong and determined young man who set out to do anything he set his mind to. 

Max was still plugging away at his studies in the culinary arts and his magic. Only 16, he surpassed me in most areas of spell work, and his cooking has grown leaps and bounds. He had decided to let his hair grow. He called it "freedom of expression". His hair was now down to his shoulders. Plus he got a tattoo of the Lightwood family crest around his bicep; flames, to be exact. 

I had a lot to be proud of when it came to my boys. Raph was a full fledged Shadowhunter, Max somehow (still can't figure out how he did this) managed to open his own successful restaurant without my knowledge. Both of my sons had accomplished so much in such a short amount of time. 

Alec, on the other hand, had changed somewhat. He wasn't the same after a routine patrol he went on with Jace one night. It had been a while since he actually been out on the field. He went out, like any other patrol, and came back a different person. When I asked him what was wrong, he brushed me off and went straight to bed. So I called Jace to see what happened. 

"We came across a vampire tonight. He was feeding on....a woman. She was 8 months pregnant. He had torn open her womb and was drinking the blood of her unborn child. Alec cut its head off without even thinking twice. I think it really messed him up, seeing that."

I sighed heavily. "Thanks, Jace. I was wondering what was wrong when he came home. He seemed....out of it."

"That was probably why. Just talk to him. He'll listen to you, Magnus. If anyone can get him to open up, it's you. Even parabatais can only do so much."

Magnus nodded. "Yeah. Thanks again. Tell Clary and the kids I said hello."

Jace chuckled. "Will do. Stop by anytime, Magnus. We're all family here."

After I hung up with Jace, I went into the bedroom. Alec was lying on the bed staring up at the ceiling. He didn't say anything as I crawled onto the bed beside him. He didn't even blink. 

"Want to talk about it?" I whispered in his ear. 

"Jace must have told you. I could hear you talking to him just then. Did he tell you?" Alec continued to stare at the ceiling. 

I nodded. "He did. That must have been....that must have been awful. I can't even imagine coming across something as awful as that and being so scared that you freeze-"

"I didn't freeze," Alec croaked. "I killed that thing right when it licked its lips and went for another drink. I didn't hesitate. But it got me thinking afterwards...."

"Of what?"

He sighed as I rest my cheek on his chest. He smelled of cologne and the outside. I loved how you could tell what season it was just by breathing in the fresh air. Each of the four seasons had its own unique scent and to this day, as old as I was, it still fascinates me. 

"I thought of the boys. It could've been them that got killed tonight. Maybe Raphael could've been out with friends and got attacked-"

"I'm sure Raphael could have handled himself, Alec. He's the best Shadowhunter of this generation."

"Well what about Max? He likes going to the library late at night to study. He could've got attacked and couldn't defend himself. He's-"

"The best warlock I've seen in a long time. You know, you doubt our kids, Alexander. They're a lot stronger than you think. As well as a lot smarter. We raised them well." I sat up on one elbow and looked down at him. "What's with you lately? You're paranoid. Quiet. Secretive. Are you having an affair?"

Alec shot up in bed. "What?! No! I'm not-I'm not cheating on you! Trust me. I can't even lie to myself let alone lie to you. If I was having an affair, you'd know...."

I knew right then that something was wrong. Thinking back on this day, I should've known better to have seen the signs of Alec's distress. The source of his distress wasn't coming from worrying over the boys. It was coming from within himself. 

"You're worried about aging again. Aren't you?"

Alec bit his lip. He didn't need to say anything to confirm my suspicion. He always had been worried about aging. I was a warlock. I don't age. At least not anymore. Pretty soon Max will stop aging too. He'll have to live with the fact that he's going to outlive his loved ones. 

"I'm getting older, Magnus. I'm in my early forties. Pretty soon I'll be fifty. Then sixty. Assuming I even make it to those ages."

"Hush. Of course you will. You're too stubborn to die."

"I'm going to get gray hair."

"Then I'll dye mine to match yours so you won't feel so bad."

Alec looked at me. "I'm going to die, Magnus. Can you live with the fact that I'm going to die an old man?"

I placed my hands on his face and gently rubbed his cheeks with my thumbs. "I can live with that. What I can't live with is the fact that you're a grumpy old fart who doesn't see how much he's loved. He has two amazing boys who love you more than anything else in the entire world. He has a husband who would sacrifice a litter of kittens to save you-"

Alec snorted. "A litter of kittens? Even for you, that's pretty harsh."

"Well it's the truth. I would steal the moon for you, Alec. If you wanted me to. I would bottle the stars-"

He stopped me by kissing my lips. "I'm going to have to stop you right there before this turns into a cheesy romance movie. But I get what you're saying. You'll do anything for me because you love me."

I smiled. "Exactly. So don't worry about aging or dying or anything of that negative context just yet. You still have a lot of years ahead of you. You still have so much more to offer the world."

He smirked and leaned in for a kiss. "Can I offer you some sexy time?"

It was my turn to snort. "Really? With the boys in bed?"

"Please. Raphael snuck out his window ten minutes ago. I heard him leave. And Max has his headphones on. He can't hear a thing."

I smiled. "So we're good?"

He nodded. "We're good."

That same Autumn was when Raphael found a parabatai. Roberta Blackwell. A tough Shadowhunter with a fierce personality, she was the perfect fit for him. Together they were a force to be reckoned with. Thankfully they were both put through the ceremony before they turned 18. 

Alec was so proud of Raphael the day he completed the ceremony. He had a smile on his face for the entire day and couldn't stop hugging Raph every chance he got. 

"Dad. Seriously. You can stop hugging me...." Raphael grumbled mid hug. 

"I can't actually. I'm just so proud of you. Not many Shadowhunters find a parabatai, and to have one is considered extremely lucky. I'm just so proud of you!"

Max laughed. "I'm so glad j don't have to go through this. Having a parabatai just seems like too much work to me."

I laughed and draped an arm over his shoulder. "Oh don't you worry. There's ceremonies warlock's go through too that you'll have to do one day. Don't think I'm letting you off easy, kid." I laughed again as Max moaned pitifully. 

That same day was the day that Max finally conquered a spell he had been working on for a long time. He wouldn't tell any of us about it. All we knew is that it was going to "blow our minds". 

"Are you ready for this?" Max sang out from the roof. 

"Just shut up and do it already, you nerd!" Raphael shouted back. The brotherly love was strong here. 

Max took a deep breath and raised his hands, making motions with them as he recited a spell. It was in Archaic Latin, which was something he learned when he was younger. 

We waited for something to happen. Outside in the cold for five minutes, we waited for some sign or another. 

Max wasn't impressed. "I thought for sure it was going to work!"

"What was supposed to happen?" Alec called out. 

Max jumped down from the roof and easily landed on two feet. "Well, it's a bit hard to explain. Basically-"

"I'm bored already. Let's go inside before we freeze our butts off. Get inside, you nerd. You're cooking dinner again. But you have to make what I want since it's my special day."

"Oh just because you have a parabatai now means you're the boss?"

The brothers bickered as they went inside, leaving just Alec and I outside. It was a really beautiful night. If we weren't in the city, we could've seen the stars above us, shining just as bright as the city lights. 

"Remember our conversation we had a while back? About aging?" I asked him. 

He turned to look at me. "What about it?"

I shrugged. "Have you changed your mind? About living forever, I mean."

Alec sighed. "If it meant spending eternity with you then yeah. I'd do it in a heartbeat. Why?"

"You'd be leaving everyone else behind, Alec. Think of Jace. Clary. Your sister. What about Raphael?"

"We can make them immortal too-"

"You really think that's what they might want? To live forever and watch everyone die around them? Not everyone is meant for immortality, my love. It takes a certain strength to deal with it. A certain patience."

He scoffed. "Like what you have?"

"Exactly. I was born like this. You grow used to it. But to have it forced on you or wished upon someone is something different altogether."

He opened his mouth to say something when the sky above us exploded into a hundred different colors. Green, yellow, blue, pink, red; it was the aurora borealis above our head. Literally. And it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in the sky before. 

Max and Raphael rushed outside to see the spectacle in the sky....as did the neighbors and the rest of New York. 

Max laughed. "That's what's supposed to happen, guys. That's what my spell is. Summoning an aurora borealis."

I stared up in awe at the lights. "And how long does it take for the sky to go back to normal, Max?"

Max shrugged. "Beats me. Pretty though, isn't it? I practiced this for years to show my love of the occasion ever arose. Raphael's ceremony seemed like the perfect opportunity to test it out."

Alec chuckled. "An aurora borealis in autumn?"

"Sure. So what? There's weirder things out there," Max shrugged. 

Raphael rolled his eyes and rest an elbow on Max's shoulder. "You know, for a smart guy, you can be really dumb sometimes, little brother."

Max beamed. "I know," he said. "I know."


	4. Winter's End

Winter. My least favourite of the seasons. Yes, the city looked beautiful under a pile of crystal diamonds that fell from the sky but it was also the time where bad things always happened to me. 

Allow me to explain. When I say "bad things" I mean that my life is flipped upside down mostly during the winter season. For example, in 1530 my favorite horse that I won in a card game took ill with a sickness and died suddenly. In 1697, the woman I had brought home one night was murdered in her own home, and I was the last person to see her thus the murder was almost pinned on me. I'm a very unlucky guy. 

Alec was the only lucky thing to ever have happened to me. The boys were my lucky things too, they were now 20 (Raphael) and 18 (Max) but Alec was my first; my first of many. He seemed to have changed my luck around. Every winter so far has been a good one. No incidents, no murders pinned on me. Not a thing. 

Max and Raphael were outside having a snowball fight as they waited for Alec and I to get ready to go to the institute. Clary was hosting a small family get together with the family, which was something she did every second Thursday of the month. Jace was out on patrol without Alec, just a routine check before heading to the get together. He said he didn't Alec to come along, even when Alec insisted they go together. Parabatais should never go out alone. But this was Jace. He's stubborn and headstrong. 

Alec was in the kitchen taking the casserole out of the oven when I heard a scream. It wasn't a frightened scream; there's a difference. So I rushed into the room to see Alec on the floor, a hand pressed against his hip as he writhed in pain and wheezed for air. I knew then and there that this could only mean one thing. 

Jace was dead. 

The pool of blood that seeped out onto the floor under him meant that his parabatai rune had faded to a pale, white scar. He screamed again. The sound....my god, the sound was awful. I can remember it as clear as day as if it just happened moments ago. It was like someone was pressing a hot poker into his skin and torturing him with it. 

I fell to my knees beside him and placed his head on my lap, cradling it. He began to sob and sputter, trying to create a coherent sentence but he ended up mumbling Jace's name over and over. The boys had rushed in at this point, and seeing their father on the floor with bloodstained clothes made them fall silent. They both knew what happened. It was only a matter of time before one of them was going to pass before the other. We just didn't know which one it was going to be. 

The funeral was held the day after. Unlike mundanes, Shadowhunters didn't fool around when it came to their dead. They didn't have an open casket or have people visit the family of the deceased or any of that funny business. Jace died a warrior's death. He was killed in combat by a rogue werewolf. I was told by a Silent Brother that Jace's throat had been ripped out and the wolf showed no mercy. This explained why Alec couldn't breathe when it happened. He could feel Jace struggling for air. 

We didn't stay long. The council set fire to Jace's body, and that's all I can recall even to this day. Alec didn't want to stick around any longer than he needed to. Not even to hug the rest of his family. They were all there; Clary and her twins, Isabelle and her husband Simon (the once mundane turned vampire turned mundane turned Shadowhunter. It's complicated) and even old Maryse Lightwood was there. Her husband Robert had passed away a few years ago, which is a story I failed to tell but to be completely honest, there's not a whole lot to tell. He died of a heart attack. Plain and simple. 

Winter grew very dark from that point on. Raphael moved to Idris to train young Shadowhunters. Max got his own apartment next to his restaurant and continued to work there. Alec....my dear Alec. I'm not sure where we went wrong. I watched as the life drained from your eyes and your soul shatter into a million pieces and not even the most powerful magic could mend you. There's no spell for a broken heart. Just time. 

Alec sat in bed for weeks before I decided to say something about it. I couldn't bear to see him in such a dark place anymore. It was too painful to see him like this. 

"Alexander. You need to eat something. You're withering away," I pushed his bowl of soup towards him but he never budged. His eyes were blank as he stared up at the ceiling. "Alec. Please. Eat something."

Once again, Alec never moved. He simply just closed his eyes and sighed heavily. He looked so tired....my beautiful husband just looked so done with everything. My only regret I had was not trying harder to get him to do something other than mope in bed. He needed to go outside. Visit family. Find something to focus his mind on. 

I gave up trying to force feed him after a while, so I left his soup there and went into the living room to light a fire. Lady MeowMeow, my newest cat after Chairman passed away, rubbed up against my leg and began to purr. She was very affectionate, this one. Always knew when you were feeling down and she tried her best to make you smile. 

"Oh, Lady. Alec needs you more than me right now. Go see if you can cheer him up, hmm?" I nudged her towards the bedroom, where she trotted off with her tail held high. 

She stopped outside the bedroom door though, just staring in and not moving a single muscle. Something was wrong. There had to be. She only froze like that if something was off or if there was another cat around, and I knew for a fact that there were no other cats around. 

I rushed into the bedroom, accidentally knocking over a stack of books as I ran in. Alec still had his eyes closed and he looked like he was in a deep sleep. Only his chest wasn't moving. 

I rushed over to the bed and attempted CPR. I zapped him with sparks from my fingers to restart his heart. I tried everything, but Alec would not wake up. He remained still with his eyes closed. 

I began to sob. "Don't you dare leave me, Alexander! You're a fighter! So fight!" I zapped him again and I thought for sure that's when he was going to slowly open his eyes and say my name in that quiet voice he always uses. But he never moved. It became clear to me that Alec was never going to wake up again. 

He was dead. 

I had a Silent Brother come to the house to determine the cause of death. Brother Damien, fairly new to the brotherhood, placed a gentle hand on my husband's forehead and turned to look at me (his eyes weren't sewn shut. Just his mouth). 

There is no poison in his system. No signs of self harm or the like. Simply put....Alexander Lightwood died of heartache Brother Damien said to me 

Heartache. Of all the things I thought for sure was going to quite possibly kill my warrior husband, it was heartache that ended up taking him from me. "So he died peacefully?" I whispered to the Brother. 

Yes. He closed his eyes and slipped into a deep sleep. He was in no pain, Magnus Bane. If anything, he died proud of what he accomplished in his lifetime Brother Damien bowed his head. Would you like me to escort his body into Idris?

I swallowed past the lump in my throat. "Yes. Yes, that would be nice. I have to contact our boys. I have to....give them the news." I watched as Brother Damien tapped on Alec's forehead and a barrier went up around his lifeless body. I couldn't watch anymore so I looked away as Brother Damien left the room with Alec's body through a portal. 

Max picked up after the third ring. "Lightwood's restaurant. Max speaking."

"Max. It's papa."

Max paused. "Papa? What's wrong? Is everything okay?"

I swallowed back a sob but it managed to escape. "Daddy just passed away, bud. Daddy's dead."

There was a silence on the other end of the phone. I couldn't tell if he was still there or not, it was so quiet. Finally I heard a small whimper. "How did he die?"

I wiped my eyes. "Brother Damien said he died of heartbreak. Jace's death was too much for him, kiddo. It broke his heart so much that it couldn't be healed. So he went to sleep and didn't wake up."

Max began to sob, reminding me of the little blueberry that used to cry himself to sleep during thunderstorms. In the background I could hear talking, people asking him if he was okay and was everything alright. 

Max brushed them off. "I'm closing up for the day. I'll be home in a half hour. Is Raph there yet? Does he know?"

I shook my head, forgetting that I was on the phone. "No. Not yet. I have to send him a fire message. He's in Idris training."

Max sighed shakily. "Okay. I'll be there in a bit."

Max came home exactly a half hour later as he promised, together we went to the institute to tell Isabelle. At first, she looked so happy to see us. When she noticed that we weren't smiling, she knew something was wrong. 

"Where's Alec?" She asked. So I told her the news. She fell to the floor and began to sob, her cries tearing an even bigger hole in my heart. I felt like I couldn't heal anybody; I couldn't help ease their pain. 

Clary was the next to get the news. Her lower lip quivered and she crossed her arms over her chest. I felt for her. She lost two people that were really close to her over the course of a few weeks and just as she thought the pain was easing up, her heart is broken again. 

Honestly, everything is blurry from then on. I can't remember much about the funeral. The most I can recall is that Raphael lost his mind when he found out the news. He trashed his office in a fit of rage and when he finally calmed down, Max wrapped his arms around his brother and they cried together on the floor. We all did. 

More winters passed. I still visited the Lightwood mausoleum from time to time, tracing a finger over Alec's name and occasionally talking to him. Or myself. Depends on how you look at it. Max and Raph visited sometimes too. Raphael was married with a daughter of his own. Max had finally stopped aging at 22 and had a boyfriend of his own. Alec would've been so proud of our sons. 

It was also winter when I met the newest addition to the Lightwood-Bane family. A small boy, no older than 9, perched in a tree just outside my apartment. He watched me with careful eyes as I laid down some hot food on my doorstep for him. Carefully climbing down, he sniffed the food before scarfing it down hungrily. Eventually, I coaxed him inside to lay by the fire to warm up. 

He had stripes on his skin. Black stripes like a tiger and I knew right away that he was an orphaned warlock that was abandoned by his family because of his unique differences from mundanes. People fear what they don't understand, but I didn't fear this child. I felt an instant bond with the boy as he sat by the fire and played with Lady MeowMeow. 

I smiled broadly at him. Maybe winter wasn't such an unlucky season for me after all. Just when I thought there was no purpose in life for me anymore, this little guy walked into my life. Just when I locked myself up and was about to throw away the key, this little boy unlocked something in me and opened the door for me again. I felt alive again. More alive than I had ever felt in a long time. 

So I adopted the boy and took him under my metaphorical wing. Gave him a warm, loving home and everything his little heart desires. He never asked for much; he never did. He was smart, kind, always had time to help someone in need and always put others before himself. 

I named him Alexander. After my sweet little archer boy.


End file.
